Addressing and Sending Invitations
By: Crystal and Jason Melendez

Authors of e-Plan Your Wedding:
How to Save Time and Money with Today's Best Online Resources


Address and assemble your invitations in time to send them out six to eight weeks before the big day. This will give everyone a few weeks to respond (set a deadline on your response card) and, if you get several regrets, will allow you to invite people on your “wish list” a few weeks before the wedding.


Create an Invitation “Assembly Line”

There’s a lot of detail involved in a finished wedding invitation, and you’ve got potentially hundreds to prepare. Use our tried-and-true method for eliminating as much error and oversight as possible!


Get It Weighed

First thing’s first: when your stationery comes in, check through the separate boxes of invitations, envelopes and enclosures. Make sure the design, wording, stock and ink color are as they should be. Then assemble a single invitation completely (including any maps, tissue paper, and even the stamp on the return envelope) and take it down to the post office to get it weighed and measured. Heavy invitations and nonstandard dimensions will push up your postal cost. Purchase enough stamps to send out all your invites and to put on all the response envelopes. The post office sells special floral and “love” designs that you might want to choose from. If you’ve got international guests, get enough postage to cover the cost of their invitations while you’re at it.


Know Your Recipients

You should have this taken care of before your stationery comes in. Put together a complete list of all your guests’ full names, mailing addresses, and the names of their accompanying children, spouses or dates. If you’re using your wedding website’s online guest database, you can easily export all this to a printed list.


Assemble the Invitations

Clear a table and set everything up like an assembly line, from envelopes to invitations to enclosures. Build stacks of all your invitation components and make sure they’re of equal number (50 envelopes, 50 invitations, 50 response cards, and so forth).

Assemble wedding invitations one at a time, and don’t have more than two people working on them at once there’s too much potential for confusion. Stamp all the return envelopes before you get started. For each invitation:

- Address the outer and inner envelopes (see below for envelope etiquette) and prepare the response card. Tuck the response card under the flap of the response envelope, with the text showing.

- Stack the enclosures, face up. On the bottom of the stack should be the tissue paper (if any), then the reception card, then the map cards and any other enclosures. On the very top of the stack place the response envelope and card.

- For a single fold invitation with text on the outside only, place this stack of enclosures on top of the invitation. For multi-fold invitations or those with text inside the fold, put the stack of enclosures inside the first fold. Insert the whole thing into the inner envelope.

- Leave the inner envelope unsealed and place it into the outer envelope flap down, so that the handwritten names on the inner envelope are visible. Leave the outer envelope unsealed for now, and move on to the next invitation.

When you’re done with this batch, all your stacks should be empty since you started with equal numbers. If you have any extras, you missed something (this is why we didn’t seal the outer envelopes yet. Check your invitations and see where the problem is. Otherwise, seal the outer envelopes, stamp them, put them aside and create stacks for the next batch.

Pace yourself, work together, and the mountain will eventually move for you. When mailing your invitations, take them into the post office and ask that they be hand-cancelled. Not all postal employees will do it, but it looks nicer than the messy machine-cancellation and can prevent invitations from getting damaged in the machines. Check off the guests’ “invitation sent” flag in your guest database to keep track of those you’ve sent invites to. Another good idea is to mail yourself an invitation with the others; this way you’ll know when local invitations have been delivered.


Envelope Address Etiquette

As was the case with your invitation wording, envelope addresses should not contain abbreviations. They should also be handwritten (don’t use stick-on printer labels). You can hire a calligrapher if you’ve got the coin to spare, or bribe a friend or relative that has exquisite penmanship (tell them it’s their wedding gift to you).

When addressing outer envelopes, write the full name of the recipient and, of course, include their address. Remember not to abbreviate! On the inner envelope, write just the surname of the recipients. Write their accompanying guest’s name here too, if you’re not sending a separate invitation to them. If this recipient has children under the age of 18 that are invited, include their first names on the inner envelope as a list—oldest to youngest. Children 18 and up (or 16 and up, it’s your call) should be sent their own invitation, even if they’re living with their parents. Here are a couple examples:


Addressing Envelopes for an Unmarried Recipient

Outer Envelope:                        Ms. Rebecca Walker
                                                  332 Oak Drive
                                                  Chicago, Illinois 60617

Inner Envelope, if No Guest:    Miss (or Ms.) Walker

Inner Envelope, if with Guest:  Miss (or Ms.) Walker and Mr. Davidson


Addressing Envelopes for a Married Couple

Outer Envelope:                        Mr. and Mrs. Lawrence Morgan
                                                  83 Chestnut Circle
                                                  Houston, Texas 77381

Inner Envelope, if No Kids:       Mr. and Mrs. Morgan

Inner Envelope, if with Kids:    Mr. and Mrs. Morgan
                                                  John, Rachael, and Daniel


Handling Your Responses

As the response cards come in, make a note of each guest’s response on your guest list and update your current total headcount. If you’re using your website’s guest database and are allowing online RSVP, many guests may have already done it for you.

Call any guests who haven’t sent a response by your deadline. You need to get a final headcount to give to vendors like your caterer, and also to know if you’ll be able to invite anyone on your “wish list”.


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ABOUT THE AUTHORS:
Crystal and Jason Melendez are the authors of e-Plan Your Wedding:
How to Save Time and Money with Today's Best Online Resources
(June 2006; $18.95US; 1-933457-00-3).
For more information, please visit http://www.eplanyourwedding.com

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